So by now, we know how to speak. Latest research shows that women say approximately 16,000 words per day, while men speak approximately 15,000. Hmmmm….but are we being heard?
Have you ever said the exact same thing to 3 different people and got 3 different answers? Well, they’re not trying to make you mad (well?…), they just “heard” you differently. We know the best way for us to communicate is by using the same “language.” Well, as I’ve stated before, everyone has a unique personality, complete with characteristics, preferences, and expectations. It’s according to these preferences and desires that we tend to “hear” others.
How about an example?
D Dominant Type: Outgoing and Task oriented. They are focused on getting things done, and as quickly as possible. When communicating, they want you to be to the point. They talk fast and more at you – than with you, and will direct the conversation.
I Inspiring Type: Outgoing and People oriented. Loves to interact; express lots of opinions and stories. They want you to be excited and fun. However, easily distracted! Keep them focused on what you’re trying to say, in an enthusiastic way!
S Supportive Type: Reserved and People oriented. Very supportive. They are low-volume, slower speakers, and ask more than state (opposite of D). Friendly, but wants you to be caring, taking a gentle tone.
I Cautious Type: Reserved and Task oriented. Tough nut to crack a conversation. Expect less verbal and more written communication, and asking a lot of questions. They want you to be accurate and reasonable.
Whew! See anyone you recognize? Yourself? Spouse? Manager? Hopefully this helps you understand why you get different answers to your questions. Not having this type of knowledge is where breakdowns occur. Assumptions are made, and tension can start. The DISC tool helps you identify these communication styles, for yourself and others. Having this information in your back pocket will help you connect more effectively with others.